A Requiem to All of Them (You Might Have Heard of it)

 The heroic, whimsical, and curious tales of all us

A memorable day, or celebration, a special occasion should not be passed by and right now I have the mission of ensuring that it is paid tribute to the valued companion that in the past two months have recently expired. An associate, to call it that, that we’re familiar with.I know it’s been more than two months, more nine weeks that in internet time that is a large amount of time. But who is really counting and this entry isn’t about me, it is about something else. One that you might have heard of it. But who is this certain obscure yet popular entity you may be asking? I know I know it well and I know you know it too. Really you must’ve heard of it.

This much is true and I hope I’m not being hastily presumptuous on this matter for what I gather all of us know it well.  I’m talking about them. I’m talking about It. It is one that changes names and differ in capabilities depending on its personal background.  It is one that behaves differently depending on age. It is, from what I can tell, one from which counsel and value are far from dispensable.

It is there, for it is often there more than not.

But a name, a name is nothing without having meaning to it because it is difficult to really grasp the meaning unless we know who the subject is. I can tell you that a name is irrelevant in this situation. This isn’t to diminish neither its position nor its value but because we could be talking about same subject yet they would all still could have different given names. Yet we have to agree that they all are essentially one.

Oh, yes, the mechanical associate that for the past years we’ve worked together side by side, to be technical about it, one in front of the other but I rather not sweat the small details. And I believe it is right there with you. Know that there is no need to look around or to the sides for it is in front of you as I speak.

Let’s amicably call it “Computer” and I’m positive it will find it an agreeable code name.  Let’s talk about it. Let’s reminisce about how it and its greatness, how it was more than often reliable and eager to help in all situations. How fearless and almost tireless and was one that had as many pockets as one could hope to imagine to store everything I threw at it. And believe me there were many things I threw at it. But Computer could easily take it for it was one that depending on the free space it could store unimaginably large amount of data as if it were a bottomless drawer.  Computer was a stand-up guy, a no-nonsense, a real silent type, a type of entity who chose to itself to pop up window and making electronic noises whenever an action was done or something unexpected of concern had happened. Computer was complex yet a practical associate and I respect practicality as well as complexity. But Computer did the most challenging possible it knew how to keep both worlds balanced not minding the small details, sticking to practicality and most urgent notice of something gone right or wrong and sometimes one more than the other.

Even those blinding bright blue screens were A-ok in my book every now and then for all of what Computer had done.

The truth and the very truth is that Computer knew how to get things done, stir me the right way and when unsure how to respond it will swiftly respond.  Computer was intrepid and would not walk out of a horrible movie unless you would and wouldn’t get scared of the world’s scariest flick! Computer would enjoy both the best and worst musicians any day of the week. You aren’t hearing it wrong, Computer was all that and given the right equipment Computer was unstoppable.

Therefore of all this, therefore it is paid tribute to Computer. Therefore it is paid tribute to an instrument of technological advances, work, and of formal and informal researching. It is my honor to offer appreciation to Computer for it was one that allowed concepts and countless ideas from many to come to life in front of a screen. As previously mentioned, I say of all of this because its departure will be missed and in retrospect I will not let this chance pass me by to tell of its tales.

Yes, for they should be known if they aren’t already to world. To tell the several moments forever engraved over the years and a history that not many might pay attention otherwise, yet they are ones we all share.  My mission today is to convey from its heroic to lesser one. From the plain moments to the thrilling ones. To tell the story of certain one in the modern age that was Always There.

The Tales of Computer are many but I will start this regardless. Though the beginning is always difficult. I know this right now, once again, Computer Was There.

Let’s start with the basics. When you first heard about K-Lite and the like packs and Computer was let’s do it and all for it. It was there.

When you were checking out Youtube comments and scrolled down looking for @ message to someone just got majorly thumbed down but could never find. It was there.

When It had a feud with 10-bit videos and didn’t respond to properly to them. It was there.

When you had to opt for 480p videos because regretfully It couldn’t play 720p or 1080p videos without lagging.  It was There.

When you first got Applocale and had to idea how to make it work. It was there.

When typing those draft that never made it live. It was there.

When It remembered the last location where you saved those files but it didn’t a minute later so you have to go back to that folder. It was there.

When you watched a Vevo video but soon closed the page because it was the censored version yet they call themselves the Music Evolution Revolution.  It was there.

When similarly you skipped the ads after the 5secs were over because no one cares about ads. It was there.

When there were only a few  days remaining in your Norton trial but you had MaCfee uninstalled anyway. It was there.

When it was there when you were left with the task of updating the iTunes library once you moved to a new one and lost your files.  It was there.

When you chucked at a recently installed program because it tried to talk you into installing Bing and decided to unchecked that box because you already have a Google bar. It was there.

When you know you have 40 days remaining in Winrar and that message buy it now never goes away. It was there.

When dll. was missing and it just goes to show that one should go legit or take some chances. It was there.

When Danbooru told you that there was ‘nobody here but us chickens!” though they were metaphorical chickens. It was there.

and It somewhat rejoiced at Noimatamia shows because they’re quality 75% of the time and let’s forget about the other 15%. It was there.

Before I continue let me remind you Computer was there

It was there when you switched to Firefox because IE wasn’t cutting it anymore.  It was there for the installation.

And who could forget how many times it endured like a valiant soldier every lackluster show scoring less than 7 rating even by MAL standards. It was there.

and when users have found a review helpful without reading said review. It was There.

When your anime batch of the week have all downloaded and you opened it from the recently downloaded list instead of the original location. It was there.

When you thought it was totally plausible that every song out there was or would be sang by Hatsune Miku. It was There.

When Adobe Reader had an update for the 99th time as you opened it and the improvements weren’t that noticeable. It was there.

When you torrented a video off NyanTorrents because of the waiting was killing you and it turned out to be fake. It was There.

When you said you’d punch your monitor and let’s hope you didn’t. It was There.

When you read a first! comment and really wondered why people do this. It was There.

And for gamers when you went to GameFaq looking for some advice on your latest game because let’s face it only a few still buy strategy guides anymore.  It was there.

When you went to Baka-Tsuki project page and saw that the VN’s translation progress hasn’t moved that much. It was There.

When you knew signing that online petition wasn’t going to bring that game, anime, or platform to your continent. It was there.

When you weren’t so sure if you were interested and aloofly said, Not sure if want. It was there.

When you got that RE: e-mail from people you didn’t know and never opened the message. It Was There.

When as a blogger you got an e-mail from a company wanting to write for them in return for goods such as clothing. It was there.

And when you got an online offer to enlarge body parts, uh, let’s leave it at that. It was still there.

When you told yourself that Blu-ray quality was overkill and that GB space was too much. It Was There.

When you leeched and not seeded after you were done like internet people. It was there.

When you wondered if there was an anime that wouldn’t have a Caramelldansen video. It was There.

When It reminded you there was only 15 minutes remaining on your battery that it’d be smart to recharge it. It Was There.

When the only thing to be found in Mangafox was “this manga has been licensed” though they still don’t sell it where you live. It was there.

When you actually knew That Feel when someone said That Feel. It Was There.

When you learned about the latest news from the internet before that in the papers. It Was There.

When you similarly wondered why the OP in a post didn’t Google the question or term before asking. It was there.

When you already knew very well what the answer was when Dracula made the rhetorical question, what is man? It was there.

When someone Objected to an Objection with the accusatory fingers because we all like objections otherwise it’d be boring. It was there.

When you got tired of Linkin Park AMV aeons ago. It was there.

Why, consequently, when you wished for The Bodies to stop Hitting the Floor for once. It was there.

Why, why. Consequently, when you muted a video or just moved on. It was There.

When you had to concur Guile’s Theme does go with everything. It Was There.

When you were in the weird part of the internet yet once again.

When an error occurred and please try again. It was there.

In your moments of confusion when you were to Nico Nico Douga but had no idea how to make anything work. It was There

And when they said “Please don’t read this” and you really didn’t because it is undoubtedly a chain spam.

When Internet connection errors ate your comment. It was There.

When you couldn’t read a message because the comment was removed by the original author. It was There.

When user was deactivated. It was There.

When you realized years ago that arguments over the internet were serious business taken with as much seriousness as reality TV and we’re all for the spectacle. It Was There.

What other moments do you recall computer asks. Respected Ladies and Gentlemen, I assure you of one thing for certain out the many things, of the many tales of Computer. The truth is that Computer was there.

Just as Planned welcomes a new year with a requiem to Computer.  I can tell you this much out of all things said here. Computer Will Be There.
Here is to all of them.


6 thoughts on “A Requiem to All of Them (You Might Have Heard of it)

  1. I think there are not otaku without computer.
    You can still buy manga but you wouldn’t discuss so much about it.

  2. So Computer is actually the humble daily-life-version of Superman…? And we never realized it… what a tragedy! Thx for the reminder ;) .

  3. When you first found an “imma firin’ mah lazar!” video and years later you still didn’t know where that came from. It was there.

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